Certainly I have many happy memories of my many years at DBCCC. Because they are memories, they are -- d'uh! -- from the past. If you have any memories of the future, let me know.

The day they told me they were paying me out (April 19/04), rather than proceeding with our agreed Reintegration plan, I let out a wail: "But I love Dorion Bible Camp!"

But frankly right now, since that day, until some major changes are made, I don't even want to visit (except campers and vol. staff, if that were possible). But I don't think the powers that be want me to either.

Thus, I have pondered "Is it only the Dorion Bible Camp of the past that I love?" Well, the DBC of the future remains unknown to all of us -- and yes the DBC of the present doesn't want me. So any love I have of DBC of the present would be in vain, unrequited, perhaps not by all, but at least by those who have Power.

I am reaching the conclusion that yes, of course, I did love the DBC of the past, but I also love the DBC of the future, ie the future as I imagined it could be. At times it did feel* to me, as I moved through the present that some (and at times the Mission itself) wanted to turn the clock back and not face that future, but I thought that we could talk it through, stop the decline in influence, numbers and finances and reconnect to a future of freedom and safety.

Especially once I had resigned from the extra burden of Summer Registrar duties in Jan. '03, I felt renewed enthusiasm to try to do my part as a revived Programme Director to fulfill that vision.

But then I learned at our Mar. 31 Reintegration proposal mtg that DBCCC has decided to heed the warnings from an influential sector re. their slip in reputation and take on a new approach. As that mtg was designed to urge me to accept their plans to reintegrate me, I was very excited to receive this news and looked forward to hashing this through, even if it meant touching some Sacred Cows. As much as we could possibly blame our woes on the attacks of Satan, doing so without finding God's means for turning things around would result only in patting each another on the back as we put up the For Sale signs -- and not in any benefit to the hundreds of youth we had hoped to reach. (It wouldn't be of much help to our careers either for that matter.)

The July 9/04 newspaper article about DBCCC's "New Direction" details some new ideas. (Family camping is not at all a new idea to DBCCC, but this is a different version, as the previous versions were attracting low numbers.) These are surface changes at this point, but that doesn't mean that they are unnecessary or bad. Some have expressed their doubts to me that DBCCC really "gets" the deeper philosophical issues, but I am reserving judgement. Time will tell.

But they have chosen to do so without me. Perhaps the story will be told that Richard was a Sacred Cow who, in light of The New Direction, had to be put out to pasture.

But that's Bull. ;)

So possibly I do in fact love the DBCCC of the future. In fact, hypothetically, I am still willing to go through the proposed Reintegration process and be there in the present.

But no matter what, they can't take my memories away from me -- of the DBC of the past, such as it was, for good or for ill.
They can take Richard out of Dorion, but they can't take Dorion out of Richard.